Thursday, April 07, 2005

Self Diagnosis "The Surreal Truths"

So was sitting in psychology last night, my favorite class with the greatest professor ever; and that’s when I realized…Damn, this class could really screw with peoples heads. You see, as humans we have this inherent ability to constantly analyze every aspect of our existence. Not only do we analyze ourselves, we more often than not probe into the lives of others. So brings me to this realization, take everything you learn and apply the contents appropriately and by God listen to your professor! Especially if she specifically states, “This information is for you to learn, not so you can freak out, read into, and begin self diagnosis.” Do we ever do as we’re told? Apparently I’m in a class with a bunch of crazies, including myself. Don’t get me wrong, I do know that there are people out there who are really sick and need help, and then there are those, like my classmates who think they have every disorder or phobia under the sun. I figured they were all doing it, I was thinking it, why not figure out what’s “wrong” with me. Here’s a few I decided against: my having an Antisocial Personality Disorder, this is mainly due to lack of me being a “sociopath.” As well, I don’t feel that I have a Psychotic Disorder, I don’t typically have delusions or social withdraw, or hallucinations, except for that one time I thought little green men were crawling on me, you were there remember?? Then I considered well maybe because of that one time there were little green men everywhere, YOU remember… that maybe I could have a Delusional Disorder…Now which one?? Erotomanic – where I’m so crazy I think someone loves me that really isn’t, like Elvis for instance, he’s madly in love with me, he even comes to my house and sings to me at night. Or wait…Persecutory – Someone or something is always after me, they want to capture me (oh yes, this is it) It’s all because of the green men! Or lastly, do I suffer from Somatic – thoughts that my body is diseased or poisoned… OH yes, I’m all three! You see, we have these green men that are in love with me, but at the same time they’re so after me, and the reason why…is because they want to poison me. It’s all so clear now! Can’t you see?? Are you there?? I know you can hear me!.......... Self Diagnosis “The Surreal Truths” To Be Continued…


Blogger Eric said...

I took the same class at Univ Texas at Dallas...its all a load of crap!!!! but at least you don't appear to be takining to seriously!

1:06 PM  
Anonymous Ivan said...

The problem, my dear Angie, is that you are a perfect girl living in an imperfect world. You certainly cannot expect some lowly mortal - professor or otherwise - to understand your splendid complexities. I know it must be tough being so wonderful - I'm almost that wonderful myself - but you will learn to embrace it one day soon I believe. Until then, I shall guide you my child.

3:37 PM  
Blogger Angie said...

Ivan you rock, you're the bestest friend I've ever had as guys go! Remember when you used to come over and brush my hair for me till I fell asleep?! Or was it the green men...? teehehe! Hope everything is well in DC, I miss ya! Yeah we are pretty wonderful aren't we?! lol!

8:48 AM  

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